Priya and Anneil had left, taking a few other disciples with them, and they spread rumors in the Indian community in Bloomington, saying I’d lost my way, that I’d been brainwashed by Christians.

I heard whispers when I went to the grocery store, people staring at me, saying, “That’s the monk who turned to Jesus.

He’s not a real swami anymore.

” I felt a deep sadness, like I’d failed them, like I’d broken their trust.

I’d lie on my mat at night, the ashram quiet, and I’d cry, asking Jesus, “Did I do the right thing? Should I have stayed silent?” But I’d feel his presence, a gentle warmth, and I’d hear his voice in my heart saying, “I am with you, Arjun.

You’re doing what I asked.

” I’d wipe my tears, knowing I had to keep going, even if it meant walking this path alone.

I started meeting with Pastor John from the church at a small coffee shop in Bloomington.

The smell of roasted beans in the air.

We’d talk about Jesus, my NDE, and how to share his love with my disciples.

John was kind, his eyes warm, and he’d say, “Arjun, your story is powerful.

You’ve seen Jesus in a way most people haven’t.

He’s called you to share that with others, even if it’s hard.

He gave me books about Christianity, simple ones I could understand, and I’d read them in my room, hiding them from the remaining disciples.

I read about the early Christians, how they faced rejection, but kept sharing Jesus’s love.

And I felt a strength in my heart, knowing I wasn’t alone.

As I read more of the Bible, I started to realize I couldn’t keep blending my old practices with my new faith.

The Omu chant had helped me at first, a way to ease into this change, but I felt Jesus calling me to let go of that, to fully embrace him.

One night, I read Acts 4:12.

Salvation is found in no one else for there is no other name under heaven given to mankind by which we must be saved.

And I knew I had to make a choice.

I couldn’t keep holding on to my Hindu practices even in small ways.

I started praying the Lord’s prayer instead.

The words Jesus taught his disciples.

Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name.

It felt new, but it also felt right, like I was finally letting go of my past and fully stepping into my new life with Jesus.

I also started to question my role in the ashram.

I was still leading the remaining disciples, still living in the prayer room with the statues of Vishnu and Krishna, still wearing my saffron robes.

But I knew I couldn’t be a Hindu guru anymore.

Not when I believed Jesus was the only way.

I felt a growing conviction that I needed to step away to fully commit to my new faith.

I talked to Ravi about it one morning in the garden.

The sun just rising, the air fresh.

I said, “Ravi, I can’t keep leading the ashram.

I’m not a swami anymore.

I’m a follower of Jesus.

I need to step down to let someone else take over.

” Ravi nodded his face thoughtful and said I understand Swami G.

I I mean Arjun I’m still figuring out what I believe but I respect your choice.

Maybe I can take over the ashram keep it going for those who still want to follow Vishnu.

I smiled grateful for his understanding and said thank you Robbie.

I know you’ll lead them well.

I heard about a Hindu festival in Indianapolis, a big event for Holi, the festival of colors where I was expected to speak, to lead a puja, to share teachings about Vishnu.

My remaining disciples were excited saying, “Swami G, this is a chance to show everyone you’re still our guru.

” But I knew I couldn’t do it, not the way they wanted.

I decided to go, but I’d used the platform to share the truth.

I went to the festival.

My saffron robes bright, my heart pounding.

The park was full of people, families laughing, children throwing colored powder, the air filled with music and the smell of samosas.

I stood on a small stage, a microphone in front of me, and I saw my disciples in the crowd, their faces hopeful.

I took a deep breath, my hands trembling and said, “My friends, I’ve always taught you to seek Vishnu, to seek mosha, but I’ve seen the truth and I need to share it with you.

” I told them about my NDE, the lie of samsara, Jesus as the one true God.

I said, “Jesus is the way to eternal life.

He died for us and he loves us.

We don’t have to keep suffering.

We can be free through him.

Then I did something I hadn’t planned.

I took off my saffron robes revealing simple clothes underneath and said, “I’m not a swami anymore.

I’m a follower of Jesus.

I’m stepping down as your guru, but I pray you’ll seek the truth for yourselves.

” The crowd was silent.

Then I heard whispers, some angry, some curious.

A man shouted, “You’re a traitor.

” Others nodded, their faces hard.

But I saw a few people, including a young woman with a child, listening closely, their eyes wide.

I stepped down, my heart heavy, but at peace, knowing I’d made the right choice.

Ravi came up to me, his face soft, and said, “That was brave, Arjun.

” Some people listened.

I saw them.

I nodded, feeling a mix of fear and hope, knowing I’d planted a seed, even if it cost me the respect of the community.

I knew I had to keep sharing Jesus’s love, even if it was hard, even if I faced rejection.

I felt Jesus with me, guiding me.

And I knew I was on the right path.

I’m here now in April 2025, sitting in my small apartment in Bloomington, Indiana, a simple cross on the wall, a Bible on my table, thinking about a moment that happened a few months ago, a moment that gave me so much hope.

Some months ago, in February 2025 precisely, I sat with Ravi in a small room at the church I’d started attending regularly, the air warm, the sound of hymns still echoing from the Sunday service.

I had moved out of the ashram a few months earlier after stepping down as its leader, and Ravi had taken over, keeping it going for those who still wanted to follow Vishnu.

I had rented this apartment, a simple place with a small kitchen, a bed, and a table where I kept my Bible.

It felt like a new beginning, a place where I could fully live out my faith in Jesus.

Before I left the ashram, I had made a big decision.

I removed the statues of Vishnu and Krishna from the prayer room.

It was a hard moment, one I’d been wrestling with for months.

I stood in the prayer room that day, the air still heavy with the scent of incense, the ghee lamps flickering, and I looked at the statues, their faces serene, their garlands of maragold still fresh.

I remembered all the years I’d spent praying to them, seeking mosha, believing they were the way to the divine.

But I knew now that Jesus was the one true God, the only way to eternal life.

I couldn’t keep them there.

Not when I’d given my life to him.

I took the statues down, my hands trembling, and packed them away, giving them to Ravi to keep in the ashram.

I placed a small cross on the wall instead, a symbol of my new faith.

And I prayed, “Jesus, this room is yours now.

Use me to share your love.

” I had also been baptized at the church a few weeks before that February day, a moment that felt like the final step in my conversion.

I’ve since gone back to using my birth name, Arjun Sharma.

I no longer go by Swami Arjunaenda.

The church was full that Sunday.

The congregation singing Amazing Grace, their voices lifting my heart.

Pastor John stood with me in a small pool at the front, the water cool, and he said, “Arjun, do you believe Jesus is the son of God, the one true God who died for your sins and rose again?” I nodded, tears in my eyes, and said, “Yes, I believe.

” He smiled and lowered me into the water, saying, “I baptize you in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.

When I came up, the congregation clapped, their faces full of joy, and I felt a peace I’d never known, like I was truly born again, fully committed to Jesus.

That day in February, I wanted to share my journey with Ravi in a new way, to give him something that had changed my life.

I held a small Bible in my hands, the one Pastor John had given me, its cover worn from all the times I’d read it.

I looked at Ravi, his face calm, his eyes curious, and I said, “Ravi, you’ve been open to Jesus, to the truth I’ve shared.

I want to give you this Bible.

It’s the story of Jesus, his words, his love.

I want you to read it, to seek him for yourself.

” Ravi took the Bible, his hands trembling, and opened it, his eyes scanning the pages.

He said, “Arjun, thank you.

I’ve been praying to Jesus like you taught me, and I feel something, a peace, a hope.

I want to know more.

” I smiled, my heart full, and said, “Read it, Ravi.

Start with the book of John.

It tells you who Jesus is, how much he loves you.

Pray to him as you read and he’ll show you the way.

We sat together for a while reading the Bible, our voices soft as we shared verses.

I read John 3:16.

For God so loved the world that he gave his only son that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

And Robbie’s eyes lit up, his face glowing with a peace I’d never seen in him before.

He said, “Arjun, I believe this.

I believe Jesus is the one true God.

I want to follow him.

” I felt tears in my eyes, my heart leaping with joy, knowing I’d planted a seed, knowing Ravi had found the same truth I had.

I prayed with him, our hands clasped, and said, “Jesus, thank you for touching Ravi’s heart.

Guide him.

Show him your love.

Thank you for using me to share your truth.

Please help the other disciples, the community to find you too.

Amen.

Ravi hugged me, his voice soft and said, “Thank you, Arjun.

I feel free for the first time.

” As we finished, I felt a renewed sense of purpose knowing I was doing what Jesus had called me to do.

I looked at the cross on the wall.

It’s simple wood, a reminder of Jesus’s love.

And I whispered a prayer.

Jesus, thank you for showing me the truth.

Use me to share your love, even if it’s hard.

Just then, I heard a knock at the door of my apartment.

I opened it, my heart racing, and saw Priya, the disciple who’d left the ashram after my NDE.

Her face was soft, her eyes red like she’d been crying.

She said, “Arjun, I heard about what you did at the holy festival, how you stepped down, how you’ve been going to church.

I was angry at first, but I’ve been thinking about it.

I’ve been reading about Jesus, and I I want to know more.

Can we talk?” I felt a wave of hope, tears in my eyes as I realized Jesus was working in her heart, answering my prayers.

I invited her in, my hands shaking with joy, and said, “Yes, Priya, let’s talk.

I’ll tell you everything.

” I looked at Ravi, his face bright, and I knew this was just the beginning.

I felt Jesus with me, guiding me, and I knew the road ahead wouldn’t be easy.

But I trusted him to lead me, to bring my former disciples to him, to use me to share his love with the world.

I whispered, “Thank you, Jesus.

” and sat down with Priya, ready to share the truth that had set me free.

 

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